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Mooooooo

When you were young (perhaps maybe later along in life and alone in the car) and saw cows standing in a field, you "moo-ed" at them in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, they would understand your utterance and reply in kind for your own titillation and amusement.  Did you think the cows liked being mooed at by passers by?  Did you think they got tired of seeing non-bovine faces that tried to imitate their speech?  Did you think that after many years of standing in a pasture enduring the barrage of constant mooers, that they would have loved to speak out just once and tell those people to please shut it?  I think they would.

 

Why, you ask am I postulating about such things?  Who really cares what a cow thinks or feels (apologies to my PETA readership)?   Let's just say that I will never again moo at a cow, nor will I encourage any children to do so because for the last seven months, I have been the cow.    I now know how it feels to be imitated in the hopes that I will respond in the same manner.  Wherever I go, "Hullo?!"  While cruising down the street on my bike, "Hullo?!"  From a passing bus, "Hullo?!"  A few inches from my face, "Hullo?!"  In the aisles of the supermarket, "Hullo?!"  From around a corner quick to duck back behind cover, "Hullo?!"  Eating at a restaurant, "Hullo?!"  Sitting in my room with the window open as I type these words, "Hullo?!" 

 

Now, it needs to be stated that their is no malice of any kind intended with these utterances and/or inquisitions, only curiosity and benign provocation, but it does not make it any less tiresome to bear.  Responding in kind as I was prone to do in my first few months here evoked the same reaction as those driving in the car or walking by the cow pasture when the cow actually replied.  Giggles of delight, "Did you hear that? It spoke to me!" fostering a desire for more mooing upon the next encounter.  I no longer moo back.  These days I just put my head down and continue grazing,  it is more difficult to tell someone to stifle that way.  Nobody likes a cow that barks.

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